Not this month, honey, I've got an election

Italian Premier Silvio Berlusconi has one-upped former US Presidential Candidate Dennis Kucinich and put himself in the esteemed company of Oral Roberts and his tower death watch for money.

Kucinich, you might remember, was somehow running for president and looking for dates at the same time. Or maybe he was looking for dates by running for president. It's hard to say. I don't remember the exact vow, but Roberts decreed he would stay in a tower and let God take him if a certain monetary donation level wasn't met. This is much the way I plan to negotiate my next raise, by the way.

But Berlusconi has added a new twist to the pandering/Head of State romance angle: No sex until the April 9 election. Yes, according to a story in a newspaper owned by his brother, Berlusconi pledged to an evangelical audience that abstinence was king for the next two and 1/2 months.

Berlusconi is married, by the way, so I'm not sure of the point. My advice to the evangelical community: take a page from the Gipper and Trust but Verify.